Holidays, Shopping, Work, Family, Friends, Insanity.

It's 1 week to Christmas. I just had to cancel an order with my favorite online store because they lost my order, and then when I call up they claim that paypal refused to charge, Yet paypal says, "nope it's all ok!". So I am forced to go into the fray and shop in the stores with all the crazies. I got what I wanted, I wasted an hour of my life waiting in lines. All fixed now.

The stresses I fell this time of the year are always the same. Choose between family, friends and those that are the closest to me. Do we decorate the house and then try to act cheery that in 2 more weeks we get to take 2X the time taking it all down? Do we not decorate and be accused by everyone of being "BAH HUMBUG"? Honestly I know the reason for the season, Both the Religious and secular reasons. It's just as I get older I see less of a reason to spend an entire weekend decorating so we can spend an entire weekend undecorating.

Then the gift thing... I dont care to get gifts, I can honestly buy whatever I want. well to an extent.. I want a $16,000 new Powermac tower with a triple 22" monitor setup. But the chances of that being given to me on Xmas are zero so the point is moot. People expect gifts. I hate giving gifts to people that expect them, I think they are rude for expecting them. On the other hand I love giving gifts to those that dont expect them. Two of my best friends are getting gifts they do not expect. He's getting something for him and his wife. Juli, she's a different story. Juli is a far bigger part of our life.. She is not expecting anything at all. In fact she is very blue about the holidays with not having anything to really give her daughter. Being a starving artist/student she really cant afford much and we really understand. Lynne and I dont want her to spend money on us because she cant afford it. but she's getting something. something very special and quite possibly something she has never had in her life. We both hope she likes it a lot.

Then my daughter... she has been in a TON of trouble this year.. well the past 4 years.. but it's getting bad. She did some very bad things and I dont know what to do about her christmas. Why is it that Teenagers go completely insane? I didn't, at least I think I didn't.

The holidays this year are an enigma to me. It's not a definite point of festivity it has been in the past. It's not a cloud of gloom. It's eh. It's blah. Friends stress about money and family dont help. But it's not making it blah.

I just wonder why some years the holidays are a burden, others a blessing, and others just eh.


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